Slightly disheartened now.
Just by Dirt's overt and unrelenting unwillingness to take any criticism that she recieves.
Like she and her followers have said such to me and I have agreed when I believe that what they say may have some truth to it.
For example I do think that they thought that my view of women was as "pretty things" "housewives". But it is not and never was so. Of course when I tried to be female I took on the stereotype. I am not female and therefore how am I meant to act when I knew my identity was male. I was afraid everyone would see through me. I felt like every day I was in Drag.
The conclusion though for me is.
I dont want to die and I want to live a full life. I feel this is my only way to do so. At least Im happy eh?
Also to bring this back to Dirt. I am also a poet. Published too.
So I shall share some.
So how can you walk like that?
Like nothing matters
Like your wearing the wrong skin
Stripped down and waiting for the boys to come in
So Why cant I save you?
Im not unwilling but your trapped
Your feet are barely touching
The floor and a gasp
As you fall once again
But stand back up and smile
Walk into the kitchen and make dinner
For your four year old daughter
Eat a singular cornflake
Go for a 4 mile run
Cry in the corner of the shed with the cats
So why cant I help?
Ive tried to explain that there is nothing
To gain but more nonsense
From you telling me your worthless
In more ways than one
Then throwing me out on the streets
For not being the woman you wanted me to be